Ruby /// Love, like or hate

Who wants to be a (Ahem) millionaire - a major fraud. Hilarious especailly the bitter contestants who didn't make it on. Cough no, cough.

Its an early Friday night which is a rarity (Friday is drinking in the bar night), as sheil has his film on at the dead by dawn festival tomorrow in edinburgh so me, sheil and cooke are going up for a full 12 hours of horror. Cry will be on at 4am and we're going the whole distance, I just hope I make it through. I was under the impression it would be like a mini edinburgh / london film fest with lots of lala and film makers but I've been warned it'll be more like lots of hardcore horror fans and goths. Will report after I've experienced the full horror.

Since my last posting I have been confined to the Sofa for a week with the dreaded Sheffield Flu (not Sars as everyone has been asking). It drove me mad as I hate being ill and always start on epic DIY projects to combat the boredom and consequently take twice as long to recover. Sheil came home to find me scrubbing the fireplace in the spare room and subsequently put a stop to my madness.

Pie and Mash

This renewed DIY interest was also fuelled by a visit to Nina and Tim's pie and mash in Hackney, which they bought 6 months ago and they are renovating (a lot) and will be/is a studio/kitchen downstairs and flat upstairs. It's an amazing building, so much space for London but is an epic project. Makes my adventures in tiling andcarpeting look like a wee paddle in comparison.

Night time view from Nina's

Flu aside April has been pretty busy, it's taken me longer than i imagined to get used to being back. It's not just the time you're away or the jet lag it's the decisions about what comes next and the things that get thrown up in the air.

Pie and Mash glass tile roof

I've been doing a lot of research into a national tour for Home-Maker and have been talking to a range of people about the possibilities, trying to get as much advice as I can really. It seems quite hard getting to talk to the right people in venues as there can be a huge administrative wall to get through, which is a massive challenge. The East Midlands as a region has the worst record for touring work nationally, so I'm determined to give it a go. I think a reason for this may be that a lot of exhibiting here is DIY, a lot of people bypass the funding system by setting stuff up themselves which is fantastic but doesn't necessarily travel. I've partnered up with Rasheeqa at Broadway who is acting as my tour ally.

B=B's space at the Austrian cultural consortium

While I was in London I met up with B+B http://www.welcome.to/b.b who are curators interested in socially engaged practice and set up events for critical debate. They are currently based at the austrian Cultural Centre which is deep in diplomatic territory in knightsbridge, a world away from hackney. I'd like to do something with them as they seem to have a really sound approach, we'll see.

I went to 2 documentary days at Intermedia and Broadway earlier in the month. The directing doc day was hosted by a polish director Witeck something, (sorry, can't remember) He had a lot of experience in broadcast docs and described his approach which was very observational, no voice over, no film maker shown or heard in the films. He used techniques like remote cameras and radio mikes with a teen friendly female camera op for a 'fly on the wall' approach. I've never had any directing training really so it was good to get an insight into his approach. I'm not a very good student though, those group discussions with people you don't know can be pretty tense. People were quite reticent to share their ideas, much more than artists.

The following day was panel led discussion with the dfg, jess search, jan peters and the guy who made the lift, mark isaacs. In the afternoon my film was shown (I left) and we pitched ideas to channel 4. Like speed dating with 40k and a film at stake. The commissioner asked us, who are you, what work do you make what do you want to make for channel4? You have 5 minutes' I blew it by being a vague artist, honestly arts applications and tv are a world apart. There's no room for woolly explorations, it's all got to be there in one sentence. Horses for courses, but the difference is fascinating. In art it seems like there is always room for some mystery, some enigmatic silences. A lot of artists make work as a way of communicating ideas so they don't have to explain them. In tv or film you've got to say what you're going to see on screen, what your voice as a director is. I think I've fallen down a gap in between the 2.

Family meal

Mothers Day was an opportunity for the whole family to get together at my grandparents and have a huge meal cooked by my brother the chef. He was pretty chuffed with the satisfied bellys and faces as we all got down to some serious eating. I really like it when the Crazes (my mum's maiden name) all get together as they are a lary lot and there's always a lot of banter.

Uncle Phil's work

My uncle phillip is an artist and makes these amazing sculptural paintings from found objects and soil he collected from the Sierra Nevada, where he lived for 10 years. He is an art dynamo - he took me out to the garage which was teaming with the work he's made over the last year or so.

Granpa's penguins

All my family collect something or other, with granpa its books and stamps, Phil - stuff for his paintings, bits of glass, stones, drift wood, Mick - pipes, bottles, Patrick - Pipes, stuff for his house, David - it used to be milk bottles with ads and phone cards, Mum- Dolls, Gran - penguins and glass piano feet (that look like jelly moulds), my favourite of all the collections.I suppose I collect shoes (mini ruby ones) and snow storms. I also really love tourist souvenirs - plates, photo ashtrays but it's not an intentional collection.

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